Homeboys

Today a priest came to our school.
Well, priests come to our school
All the time, since we are a private
Catholic school on a quiet corner
In New York's Upper East Side.

He talked about the kids he works
With. Well, not really kids, but people
Who missed out on a real childhood.
He was really good. He perfectly mixed
Humor with seriousness with sadness.

Burying 165 kids? That's intense.
And he got emotional after every
Story he told about a dead kid.
And I felt really...I don't know
How to describe it. Foreign, I guess.

I don't know what it's like
To get super emotional over
People dying. I mean, this woman I knew
At Church died this year, so did the
Lady I fed at the nursing home, I have
No grandparents, one of my uncles
Died a few years ago. I only sort of wept
Over the lady at the nursing home.

I didn't really know any of
My relatives well. Like, I'm not
Too close with my relatives.
They're all in Poland or too
Busy to like get to know me.
Or they're too conservative and
I'm too crazy for a calm connection
To be made.

I also don't know what it's like
To get super-emotional for a reason.
I always crash randomly.
Or I have too much on my mind
And I don't realize it until the most
Random thing turns me into
A hysterical, crying mess.
I wish there were reasons.