Comatose

Taken from the pursuit of happyness

People who are fans of Breaking Benjamin, no.  Just, no.  I'm talking going to the gym, working out heavily for an hour, and not being able to think or breathe afterward.  I want to be tiny.  Like, actually be the size of a child.  Okay, maybe not.  That would make every dude I know a pedophile.  But still.  I am working my ass off that I feel comatose and come back to life eventually.  I was tired to the point that, I laid in bed, playing "Yankee Bayonet" for 2 hours and then met up with my programmer friend.  Good day.

Preparation

Taken from impio

I sit down to do it.  To review everything I need to know for next year.  And I go at it for a good hour, getting super excited that maybe I'll understand something and do well next year.  But then I realize it's summer.  And then I get all sad.  I should be out on a Friday.  I kind of want to go do a work out.  But once again, it's Friday and I've already worked out.  I miss college and having friends not being so far away.

Spinning

Taken from Tequila Always Helps

My endurance hasn't been tested this hard since I went to tennis camp.  My entire body does not exist right now.  During the workout, I wanted to die after 10 minutes.  And had 35 to go.  But with the music, the enthusiasm, and everyone else just doing it...the motivation was incredible.  And I want to go back.  But after I fix my knee.

Priest (M.R.)

Taken from Google

I found Priest  to be a perfect summer movie.  It does not require much thinking, has a fun plot, and awesome explosions and fight scenes.  I am a fan of pretty mindless vampire-related action movies, but this pretty much took the cake.

Imagine putting together a horror movie about dystopia, mixing in an action movie, adding elements of Van Helsing, throwing in a Western, and add in vampires and that's the movie in short.  I had a lot of fun seeing it with my friends, but not sure if it is worth the cost of 3D.

Rating: 6/10

Summer Reading

Taken from la dolce vita

I want to read this summer.  I want to read a lot.  Something like ten books all summer.  Or something.  I want to get my literacy on.  So when people approach me, I can have something really unique and awesome to talk about.  Like how much I liked Dune or how quirky Super Sad True Love Story was.  Or maybe I didn't like a book.  So I can talk about them with the same criticism I do my music.  And to not sit on my butt all summer.  Well, sit on my butt doing nothing.  Amendment!

Top Moments of Freshman Year of College

Ten Things That Rocked Freshman Year

1. That one night at Thumpty
2. Being at Thumpty most weekends
3. Slope Day
4. Chem class
5. BME class
6. Sledding
7. Middle of the night trips to the Commons
8. Movie nights
9. That one Seal and Serpent party
10. Actually having a winter break

Ten Things That Sucked Freshman Year

1. People graduating
2. Not being able to do my major
3. Engineering classes for the most part
4. Computer science
5. Not having heat in winter
6. Winter lasting until April
7. Finals first semester
8. Spraining my finger sledding
9. ???
10. ???

Too Much Fun with Scarves (B.O.A.)

As you can see, I'm in a library

It's too early in the morning to be doing anything that's actually productive.  So I've been blogging.  And learning how to tie scarves in fun ways.  In this pic, I tried to do a bow.  The tie is a little too bulky to do a cute one, but it looks fancy enough.

The shirt is from Urban Outfitters and the scarf is Hardtail.  Yeah, I know my hair is a mess, but screw it.  I'm in the thrust of finals week.  Two more tests left, wish me luck!

It's Misty (B,O.A.)

5/17/11 by jladz65 featuring vintage tops

I woke up this morning feeling like I should do something cute with my appearance.  So I decided to wear one of my favorite tank tops with my favorite pants with my favorite flats and favorite jacket.   I also wore a score but I could not find it online.  Sadface, I know.

The tank top is from Abercrombie and Fitch (sue me).  The jeans are from BDG from Urban Outfitters.  The flats are kimchi blue for Urban Outfitters.  And the jacket is from Michael Kors.  The scarf I'm wearing is from Hardtail. 

Here's a pic of me with my scarf.  I look tired.  It's what studying for multiple hours a day does to people:

 

Last Week

Taken from closer ❦ to the sun

As in, it's the last week.
Not like, last week as in the
Week before this one.

It's the last week here.
And I'm spending time with friends


Studying.

Exciting, I know.
But after Thursday,
I'm spending time with them not studying.

Watching movies,
Packing,
Waling around.

The packing is going to be the worst.

Unlike last year when I moved here,
I did not abandon my room completely.

But this time, I am.

I'm never coming back to this
Ghetto of a dorm I lived in.
Well, I might, but that'd be creepy.

But either way,
My possessions are going into bags
And boxes
And in plastic
And the room will be like
I found it in August 2010.

"And I Dressed Up Like a Princess"

Taken from iheart-myself
Lyrics in title from "The Competition" by Kimya Dawson

I just want to be as good as I'd like to be.  Being better than the person that I was just yesterday.  I mean, it's hard but it's a better standard to hold myself up to.  Than to compare my life to that of someone else.  I've got my own stuff to deal with and I'll deal with it in the best way that I can.  But sometimes it gets hard when it seems like people aren't in the same place.  I just want to meet someone who can completely relate to me, but that would involve wasting precious minutes that I could use studying for my finals.

So I'll dress as cute as possible.  I'll write sentences so elegantly that my English teacher might cry.  I'll write the right equations and the TA's will just throw points at me.  I will sort the mail quickly and be the most polite that I can be.  I'll write down bio processes with precision and accuracy.  It'll be the best finals week that anyone has seen.

Slope Day Eve (B.O.A.)

Taken by my friend.

I realized I haven't done one of these in a while.  But this passed weekend was slope day and me and my friends went out that Thursday to celebrate the last day of classes.  It was too much fun haha.

The tank top is from Victoria's Secret, the scarf from a vendor, the pants from American Eagle, the shoes from Amazon,the hat from Urban Outfitters and the bracelet from my mom.

That Was That

Taken from the pursuit of happyness

So at Slope Day yesterday, I sat on a lawn with my best friend and he said "you need to find out once and for all."  Of course, regarding to how that one boy felt about me.  So I did and it wasn't nice.  And my best friend turned to me and said "Now you know and you can move on."  So I'm deciding to go down that road.

My Two Cents (N.a.P.)

Taken from Yahoo! news

I want to preface this with the statement that I am not one for revenge.  And that is mostly because I had a Christian upbringing where if someone wrongs you, turn the other cheek, walk away, talk it out, or in general do anything that doesn't involve hurting the other person because it's better for the soul.  Or because you're better than that, pick your side.

That being said, there's also the concept of justice.  Justice is generally defined as moral righteousness or exacting some form of punishment on people who performed misdeeds.  Sure, it is not right to revel in the fact that someone just died, but this man wronged a few thousand people in a matter of hours ten years ago.  I don't think the US should have out right killed him, but if he went down in a fight, then at least they gave him a shot.  I'm sure the US would have much rather given him a trial and heard his side of the story than just taking a gun to his head, as South Park seems to imply (South Park is not a credible source for anything, just so you know).  Some people argue, this point I agree with, that they gave the suspects a trial, but that's because they were suspects; it wasn't a known fact unlike in Osama Bin Laden's case.  But that doesn't mean we should have outright killed him.  But if they were planning on taking him and he wouldn't go without a fight and got killed during the raid, that's what happened.  Can't change that.

Most parts of the US are celebrating.  Hell, people are posting statuses equating it to Harry Potter or talking about how coincidental it is that 66 years ago, Hitler was also announced dead on May Day.  That's people's means of expressing themselves.  Others are worried or fearful of what is to come.  Al-Qaeda just lost one of its leaders, so they are probably mournful of that.  And perhaps even planning on retaliating.  But I guess all we can do is hope that things will get better, because right now, there is no guarantee.

Music Shout Out (M.S.O.)

Hey guys,

So I am ending the segment of my blog entitled "Music Shout Outs" or M.S.O.  I decided to make a whole other site for on tumblr because pictures would be easier to acquire and I can get more readership through that.  That does not mean I am transferring this blog to tumblr as well.  I like having it on blogspot.  But the URL for the music critique is: Music Shout Outs.  I hope you guys enjoy it!

Hugs,
Jo

Not Having It

Taken from la dolce vita

He comes from across the hall with all the charisma in the world and your dance moves are completely in sync with mine. So I reciprocate a bit.  Not too much, but just enough for us to be established as dancing partners.

But then your face gets too close to mine and I dance away, breaking our bond of jumping and swinging.

Another he comes from across the hall with a little less charisma, but he's a friend.  So as friends we dance and as friends, we dance and communicate, though we're not quite in sync.

But then his face gets too close to mine and I dance away, breaking the friendship for a split second

Melting

Taken from the pursuit of happyness

It's so warm out.  So warm that even though I can wear pants again, I can't.  I'll feel too sticky.  And I generally like my body.  Especially my legs.  They're strong.  They can handle 20 pounds on each side of a workout bar.  They can do 25 pound squats.  I feel strong.  But I don't feel so good when I see other people in their not-pants.  But I also try to ignore it.  The people who think I'm cute, already think I'm cute. And if people want to judge.  Well, let them.  They're bored.

It's So Close

Taken from perfectly composed brokeness

The year is almost over. I can relax and take as many aromatic baths a day as I want.  I can walk around and take pictures all I want.  I can finally get rid of this heavy, heavy burden of stress.  I can enjoy the moments I get to myself.  But what I won't be able to do until August would be to see my friends.  So I am enjoying their presence now.

Awkward Smiles

Taken from la dolce vita

I could choose to write about more serious things.  But I don't.  I want to write about how giddy that boy makes me.  The feeling of I want to smile so much that my mouth hurts everywhere and you can see my teeth and stuff.  Yeah, that kind of feeling.  And ugh, we don't do anything.  We go to each other's events and sit and study in the engineering building that will be slightly foreign to me soon.  I guess my academic direction is slightly falling apart, but at least one thing is going well.  And I just want to be fucking giddy.  Like a hamster with a sunflower seed.  Or a girl with a crush.

It Happened

Taken from p.heartache

You know that breakdown I was talking about a few weeks ago?
Where I lose it just enough to seem fine to everyone?

It happened.

And there was nothing poetic or beautiful about it.

It was just a lonely college freshman girl walking home from a party because she drank and got a mildly upset stomach, which is usually an indicator of emotion trial.

And what a struggle it was.

The hammer of everything that isn't working out
Right now came down hard
And instead of ringing with a clap,
Tears came out of my eyes and my head hurts as if that mallet actually hit me across the face.

I'm getting pushed down again.
Shoved down.
And knocked over at the slight
Hope of getting up.

I tried coming up with a counter argument.

Just because I might not get to do what I want,
Maybe the alternative is better?

I didn't go to the college of my dreams.
Is the alternative better?
I don't think it wants me here.
The people at it do (I think, I hope, I want)
But it seems to be doing everything to drive me away.

I do everything right, but everything goes wrong.
And I just want a neutral day tomorrow.

Oh wait,
Matlab test.

One thing that will either get rid of or enhance the reality that
Nothing seems to be going right.

Discouraged

Taken from life is wine

Ever feel like if you had infinite time and infinite effort, things still wouldn't work out?  I want my hours back.  I want that entire night back.  I don't care that I spent it with a boy I really like.  I would've if it had results.  I could've not studied for that test and still gotten the same result.  What's the point of formulating exams and assigning practice problems that are totally unrelated?  And you just completely want to give up because that's the test you had most time to study for and the only thing you know about the others is that they will suck.  The most depressing statement ever is that I can start to see why people would want to give up completely and hurl themselves into a gorge.  This is not to say that I want to do that, but I can see why.  You work and you work and you get no results.  Hours wasted.  You feel like you know things, but you don't.  You simply don't.  You don't know them in the way the professor expects you to.  And I want to give up, so badly.  Just to stop and just plow through everything.  But goddammit, I've gone through my entire life so far not getting what I want, and if I don't fucking get my major, I don't know what I'll do.  And I'm not going to let a bunch of little questions deter me.  Even though this is the hardest thing I've had to do yet.