Ever feel like if you had infinite time and infinite effort, things still wouldn't work out? I want my hours back. I want that entire night back. I don't care that I spent it with a boy I really like. I would've if it had results. I could've not studied for that test and still gotten the same result. What's the point of formulating exams and assigning practice problems that are totally unrelated? And you just completely want to give up because that's the test you had most time to study for and the only thing you know about the others is that they will suck. The most depressing statement ever is that I can start to see why people would want to give up completely and hurl themselves into a gorge. This is not to say that I want to do that, but I can see why. You work and you work and you get no results. Hours wasted. You feel like you know things, but you don't. You simply don't. You don't know them in the way the professor expects you to. And I want to give up, so badly. Just to stop and just plow through everything. But goddammit, I've gone through my entire life so far not getting what I want, and if I don't fucking get my major, I don't know what I'll do. And I'm not going to let a bunch of little questions deter me. Even though this is the hardest thing I've had to do yet.
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